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Wednesday, October 7, 2009

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From the Inside Out

There is probably nothing more powerful in beginning a conversation or transaction, or in overcoming an interpersonal challenge, than a smile. A warm, genuine, sincere smile that emanates from your heart (from the inside out).

95 percent of the troubles we encounter with others could most likely be resolved peacefully but for a smile, followed by genuine concern for the other's needs. The fact that most people don't do this will only make it easier for you to put yourself ahead in the game when it comes to persuading others to take your side of an issue.

When you must speak with someone's supervisor about a particular challenge, your smile will bring down his or her walls of resistance, and set the tone for a pleasant, win/win discussion and positive result.

One main reason is that you've just separated yourself from practically everyone else whose greeting is a defensive, angry, or intimidating word or look.

In his book, "Working With Emotional Intelligence", Daniel Goleman writes, "It happens that smiles are the most contagious emotional signal of all, having an almost irresistible power to make other people smile in return." Isn't that so true? In fact, read any good book on people skills and there will be at least a mention of the power of
a smile.

John Mason, author of "Let Go of Whatever Makes You Stop", writes, "One of the single most powerful things you can do to influence others is to smile at them." Very true! Dale Carnegie devoted an entire segment of his awesome book, "How to Win Friends & Influence People", to this single fact.

Don't feel badly if this does not come naturally for you. For some, it takes practice. Fortunately, it's very easy to learn how to smile effectively. If necessary, simply imagine something that truly brings you joy and think of that before you need to smile. After a few practice sessions, you'll be able to bring forth that smile naturally, "from the inside out."

It seems very few people smile without a particular reason. But that doesn't have to include you. Get that smile on your face before you deal with anyone; the service person, government bureaucrat, your boss, the waitperson, your spouse and children; everyone. Get yourself ready for that person to like you and smile back at you!

I employ this simple action all the time and everyday with incredible results and I know others who regularly do the same. They quite often get waited on or helped at a crowded
desk first, just because the person sees them with that smile.

This week, while feeling grateful for all your blessings, let those blessings bring a smile to your face. A smile "from the inside out."

[Source:, by Bob Burg]

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Debbie Berry on October 11, 2009 at 10:22:00 PM GMT+8 said...

I love this. It is so true. There are a lot of hurting people out there who need a smile. It's always best to have lots of them to give. Thanks so much for sharing! :)

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